


Yes.

by prettysoftlouis



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Dark Harry, Dark!Harry, Drama, F/M, Fluff, Gay, M/M, Possible smut, Yikes, im sorry, its all good, larry - Freeform, larry stylinson - Freeform, lots of gay, some violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2019-02-02
Packaged: 2019-04-19 11:13:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14236053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prettysoftlouis/pseuds/prettysoftlouis
Summary: Harry Styles is a jock at school who is hiding a dark secret. Louis Tomlinson is Harry's tutor, who develops a major crush on him until he finds out Harry's life. Filled with drama and angst. Enjoy





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoy this!

“Mr. Styles? Please come with me for a minute,” the principal motioned for high school jock Harry Styles to follow him outside. 

The entire class snickered as Harry got up from his seat and hurried out the door.

“How are you today, Mr. Styles?” he tapped his foot impatiently, but didn’t wait for Harry to answer him before continuing, “as you know, graduation is in a few months. However, it looks like you will not be graduating. You have not done your community service, and your grades are disgraceful.”

“Alright. Did you just come here to scold me? Because I really don’t care. We both know I don’t need good grades. I’ll get a football scholarship and everything will be fine for me. Now if you excuse me, I am going back to class.” Harry turned to walk back into the classroom when the principal let out a laugh.

“What?” Harry squinted.

“I set you up with a tutor, Mr. Styles. If you don’t care that much about school, and don’t want to graduate, that’s on you. But if some part of you still cares, meet your new tutor in the library at two. I hope you will make the right decision, Harry. Good luck.” 

Harry walked back into class with his eyes open wide and sat back in his seat. All of his friends stopped paying attention to the lesson and turned towards him to get filled in.

“What did he say? What happened?” His best friend, Tim pried.

“Mr. Schneider said I won’t graduate and set me up with a tutor,” Harry said simply.

“Woah, dude, you don’t actually have to go, right? We all know you don’t care about school,” Another one of Harry’s friends spoke up. 

“He said it was mandatory or I’ll get expelled before graduation. I won’t walk the stage if I don’t go,” Harry lied. He really didn’t have to go, but he was curious as to who the tutor would be. 

“That sucks, bro. I hope everything goes okay,” his friends all patted his back and gathered their things. 

"Yeah, me too."

-

Harry looked at his watch. it was five minutes to two. He was nervous, more nervous than when he—  
No. Harry can NOT think about that right now. He needs to meet his tutor.  
With a deep breath, he opened the library doors.


	2. I.

As soon as Harry opened the door, the overwhelming stench of old books consumed him. He hated the library; so many bad memories there.

He scanned the room in search for the nerdiest person in the room, but he shortly found himself empty-handed. He began to walk through the isles upon isles of books, looking for an indication of who his tutor is. He hated the principal at that moment for not telling him who he should be looking for. 

In the far corner, he found an underclassman talking to the principal. 

You have got to be kidding me, Harry thought.

He hung his head a little as he made his way to the laughing duo. He stopped in front of the table and cleared his throat, ending their laughter.

“Ah, Mr. Styles, I’m so glad you could make it. This is your tutor, Louis Tomlinson,” Mr. Schneider said, motioning to the boy sitting next to him.

“Hi!” The boy, Louis, cheered out, making Harry’s head hurt and his ears ring.

“Well, I’ll leave you two alone then. Make this session a good one!” Mr. Schneider turned towards Harry, and before he walked away completely he whispered, “I knew some part of you still cared.”

He patted Harry on the back and made his way to the exit. Harry sort-of wished he wouldn’t have gone because now it was awkward. Harry didn’t do good with new people unless he was—  
Not now, intrusive thoughts. Please.

Harry gently shook his head and pulled out a chair. He sat down and kicked his feet up on the table. Hell, if he was forced here, he was going to make himself comfortable.

“Hi, I’m Louis, as Mr. Schneider mentioned. I understand you’re a senior and I’m a junior, and I’m honored Mr. Schneider picked me to tutor-” Louis was rambling, so Harry cut him off.

“Enough! I don’t care who you are or what you do. The only reason I even came down here was to get out of class. I don’t need a damn tutor and I definitely don’t need your voice ringing in my ears! Just your presence is giving me a damn headache. Just shut up!” Harry shouted, loud enough for a couple people nearby to turn their heads. Harry put him on the table.

Poor Louis didn’t know what to say, so he just stayed silent. He opened the calculus textbook and gently slid it near Harry.

“For fuck's sake, mate. Just let it go! I don’t want to fucking be here!” Harry pushed the book onto the ground.

That made Louis snort.

“What now?” Harry sighed, rubbing at his temples.

“No, it’s just funny that I was asked to be your tutor and Mr. Schneider even told me you were going to be a hassle, but I didn’t think it would be this hard,” Louis laughed.

“Fuck you,” Harry spat.

“Hey now, be nice. I think you’re only acting like this because you’re in school. If you weren’t so hung up on your ‘bad boy’ image, you would’ve picked that book up,” Louis got really close to Harry and whispered, “I know you, Styles. I know you really do care about school, you just don’t want to admit it and lose your status in front of your friends. Tell you what; I will give you my number and my address. We will meet tomorrow after school, my place. That way you’re out of your friends’ view. You can still act like a jock around them, you can push me around if you need to. Do your job, whatever. But you have to let me do mine. Got it?” Louis folded his arms and raised his eyebrow, waiting for Harry’s protest.

“Fine,” Harry leaned back in his chair.

Louis smirked. “Fine.”

Harry left the library twenty minutes later, Louis’s phone number tucked safely in his backpack. He ignored all of his friends' questions of how it went and who the tutor was. He denied going to play football on the field, he just wanted to go home and sleep.

He got in his car and drove home. He threw his stuff down on the floor next to the door, poured himself a glass of wine, and went to his bedroom. He fell asleep with his phone in his hand, a new message just sent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you guys are enjoying this as much as I'm writing it. Feel free to leave feedback, as I am new to this whole "writing and publishing" thing. Have a beautiful day!


	3. II

Harry couldn’t sleep well that night. He kept thinking about how Louis wasn’t afraid of Harry; how he didn’t back down. He checked his phone throughout the night, only receiving one text. It was from Louis, and it only said “Hello.” 

Harry wanted to keep the conversation going. He wanted to get to know this Louis kid. But he was scared. He was scared if he got too close, Louis would find out about him and his dark secrets. His dark side. He refrained from sending another text. 

He decided to skip school that day. He deserved the day off, dammit. It’s not like he had anyone to tell him no, either. His mom moved away when he was sixteen and his father, well… he’s not in the picture. He never was.

He kicked his feet up on the coffee table after sleeping for a few extra hours, his TV remote in his right hand and a bottle of liquor in his left. He flipped through the channels, Louis flickered in his mind every couple seconds.

Who was Louis? Why wasn’t he afraid of Harry? Why did Mr. Schneider make Louis his tutor? None of it made sense to Harry. He so desperately wanted to text Louis again but didn’t. Not until he texted Harry asking him what time he wanted to come over.

'Shit' Harry thought. He forgot he told Louis he would come over to study. Maybe there he could learn a little bit more about him and who he is as a person. 

Harry typed a reply to Louis, asking what time would be best for him. He didn’t reply. Harry threw his phone down and went to get in the shower. By the time Harry got out, Louis had texted him twice. He asked if Harry could come over around four. Harry looked at the time on his phone, it was three twenty-two. He texted Louis back and said yes.

As Harry was blow drying his hair, he started to feel anxious. He didn’t take his medication today. He started to think about his past and he was about to go into an anxiety attack when his phone went off again. He set down the hair dryer and tried to breathe steadily as he went to read his phone. It was from his best friend, Zayn. Zayn just got out of a mental hospital. Harry believes it was because of him, but Zayn assured him it wasn’t. He was just crazy, he laughed along with Harry. 

Zayn was doing pretty good now that he was out of that hellhole. Harry knew how bad it was in there because that’s where they met. Zayn kept Harry sane in there. He got out before Zayn, only because Zayn had a psychotic break in there, and had to stay longer. Harry was glad he was out and he was glad Zayn was out too. 

Harry shook his head and looked down at his phone in his hand and remembered what he had to do. He typed out a reply to Zayn, feeling calmer already. He had asked if Zayn wanted to come over tonight for some pizza, beer, and to watch a football game. Harry slid his phone into his pocket after Zayn said yes, he slipped on his shoes and out the door he went.

-

He arrived at Louis’ house a little before four. He had no idea he and Louis lived so close together. It was only a ten-minute drive. He shook off his nerves as he parked and made his way up to the front door.

There were two cars in the driveway, and he wasn’t sure if Louis had a car. He was nervous. Harry hasn’t met anyone’s parents since before he moved to London. He was fourteen when he moved. He was eighteen now, and the anxiety was eating him alive. 

Harry was so lost in his thoughts he didn’t even realize he made it to the front door. He took a deep breath and knocked on the door. 

A woman answered she looked to be in her late thirties. 

“Hi. You must be Harry! Louis told me you would be coming. Oh, how rude of me! I’m Louis’ mom. Come in! Sit down and I’ll bring you some tea! Louis will be down shortly!” The woman stepped to the side and held the door open.

Harry walked in and thanked her. She led him to a large living room and he took a seat on the sofa.

“Any sugar or honey for your tea?” She called from the large kitchen.

Oh, no, that’s alright!” He called back, looking down at his hands. They were still shaky.

“Here you go, darling,” She placed a saucer with a teacup in the middle of it on their glass coffee table.

Harry could have kissed her. He hadn’t been called any loving names in years. He missed having a parental figure. He wanted his mom.

“Thank you, ma’am,” Harry smiled, a dimple popping up.

“Oh, call me Johannah, darling, but you’re welcome,” She smiled and held her hand out for Harry to take.

Harry wiped his sweaty hands on his jeans and took ahold of sweet Johannah’s.

“Thank you for being so nice to Louis. I know you guys only met yesterday, but Louis is very lonely. He only has two friends that he talks to, and it really means a lot to me as a mother for you to be so kind to him, and thank you for being nice enough to come over here. I know there are a million other things you could be doing right now. Thank you, Harry,” She smiled sadly and patted him on the shoulder.

Harry made a mental note to ask more about that later. He now knew a little more about Louis. He realized how similar they are. The only real friend Harry has is Zayn. His other popular “friends” aren’t friends at all. They don’t know the real Harry. The only one that does is Zayn.

Louis came barreling down the stairs seconds later, a couple little girls trailing behind him. 

“I’m so sorry, Harry, I had to help these little ones. I hope my mother didn’t embarrass me too bad,” He grinned at her and she chuckled along.

“Only a little,” That earned her a slight swat on the arm.

Harry misses that; playing around with his family. His thoughts were interrupted by a little girl in front of him.

“Hi! Who are you? Are you Louis friend? I didn’t know Louis had more than two friends!” One of the little girls set her hands on Harry’s knees.

Johannah gave Louis a sad smile. Louis turned beet red and looked down at his feet.

“My name is Harry, and I am Louis’ friend,” Harry smiled at the little girl.

He had no idea where that sentence came from. He only met Louis yesterday, and Harry was very skeptical about calling people his friends. He hasn’t talked to a little kid in almost four years. He didn’t like to. It made him feel awkward, and reminded him of…His brain told him he just felt bad for Louis. He knew how it felt for everyone to laugh and make fun of him for being alone and he didn’t want anyone else to feel that way. He was interested in getting to know Louis, though.

“Okay girls. Let’s go in the kitchen and leave Louis and Harry alone to study, yeah?” The girls jumped up and followed their mother.

“I’ll show you to my room,” Louis said after a few seconds, his face only slightly turning back to normal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you are enjoying reading this as much as I am writing it. I promise it'll take off soon. Just have to get through the basics!


	4. III

As Harry and Louis were walking up the stairs and down the long hallway to get to Louis’ room, he looked at all the walls. Pictures upon pictures of Louis and his siblings were strategically placed on the wall. No pictures of Johannah or any of Louis’ father. Harry wanted to ask him about it but decided against it. After all, they had just met twenty-four hours ago. 

Harry turned his attention back to the boy in front of him. Louis was wearing plain navy joggers that were tight all around. He was wearing all black socks and a grey loose shirt. He had a black zip-up hoodie thrown over his shoulders. Harry’s eyes drifted back down from Louis’ head to his ass.

What a nice bum. Harry thought.

He shook his head clear of all his dirty thoughts, like how his ass would look without his joggers on. Or how cute he would look completely under Harry, his eyes screwed shut, his back arching, screaming out Harry’s name…

Not again. Harry can’t think about that right now. He could feel his pants getting tighter, he had to think about something to stop his growing hard-on. He thought about his grandma. His sweet, pure, innocent grandma. He felt much better after that. Harry loved his grandma, he just didn’t love her in that way. 

As Harry physically cringed for even thinking about his grandma with the beginning of a boner, Louis stopped in front of a door. Harry looked back behind them because, damn, it was a long hallway. 

Louis opened the door, stepping aside and letting Harry go in first. 

“Enter,” Louis giggled.

Harry walked in and awkwardly stood there as Louis closed and locked his door.

“I promise I’m not going to kidnap you. If I don’t lock my door, the girls bust in. And sometimes I’m not..decent,” Louis laughed louder this time. Harry joined in with a chuckle.

“I see,” Harry’s eyes wandered over Louis walls, comic and movie posters everywhere. 

“Do you have any siblings?” Louis asked suddenly, plopping down on his bed.

“None,” Harry answered. He did have one, but he wasn’t going to tell Louis that. He can’t open up to someone right now. Not until he figures out who Louis is.

“Ah, you’re so lucky. I love my siblings, but God, are they a lot sometimes.”

Harry looked over at Louis who was laying down on his bed, his feet planted on the floor, his hands crossed over his stomach, his eyes glued to the ceiling.

“I’ll bet.”

“Oh my God, how rude of me. Here, come sit down. We can make a study schedule and figure out what we can do about your grades,” Louis shot up and arranged himself so he was sitting cross-legged on the bed. 

Harry strode over to the bed and sat down, very uncomfortable and awkwardly he might add, on the bed. After a couple seconds, he said, “You have a cool room.”

“Thanks, dude. But you look so out of place. Get comfortable. God, how do you wear those jeans? Jeans are so uncomfortable,” Louis shook his head and pretended to look disgusted.

Harry laughed at that and scratched the back of his neck. He looked around once more and he spotted a small rainbow pride flag hanging over by his Harry Potter poster. Louis followed Harry’s eyes and as soon as he realized Harry was looking at the flag, his face flushed and his eyes went wide. He rushed over and took it off the wall. He quickly threw it in the closet and slammed it shut.

“Louis-” Harry started.

“No. Don’t. Just pretend you didn’t see that. I’m sorry,” Louis interrupted. He held his head in his hands for a few seconds and calmed his breathing before sitting back down on the bed.

“So, how about that study schedule?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you're enjoying this! Leave some comments and kudos!


	5. IV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is kinda a filler and I'm sorry. It'll get good soon!

Harry wanted to tell Louis it was okay. He wanted to tell him he was gay too, so he didn’t feel alone. The last thing he wanted was for Louis to feel the same way Harry felt a few years ago. But he didn’t. He dropped the subject and remained silent.

Why was Harry acting like this? Did he actually care about someone other than himself? It was a scary idea and Harry had to stop it before he showed Louis the real side of him. 

“So, how about that study schedule?” Louis repeated, his eyes begging Harry to not say anything about what he just saw.

“Sure.”

Louis got out a piece of paper and drew the days of the week on it.

“Okay, I can do every day except Tuesday because I work, and Saturday because I do things with my family. What about you?” Louis stopped writing and looked up at Harry.

Harry cleared his throat and acted like he wasn’t just staring at Louis’ bony hand gripping the pencil. 

“Uh,” Harry hesitated. He couldn’t do Thursday because he had therapy. He didn’t want to tell Louis that because nobody else knew that besides Zayn. Nobody knew his secrets. His therapist didn’t even know all of them. He also couldn’t do Saturday, which was a relief.

“Hm?” Louis prompted, his head cocked to the side.

“Sorry. I was just thinking. I can do every other day except Thursday,” Harry finished his sentence, hoping Louis doesn’t ask why.

He doesn’t. Instead, he writes it on the notebook paper.

“Great. Every other day. What time would work for you on Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and Sunday?” Louis stops writing and looks up at Harry again. 

“Uh,” Harry hesitates again.

“Well, I know you don’t want to study at school. How about after-” Louis gets cut off.

“I have football practice Monday and Tuesday. It would have to be after that. It ends at four,” Harry feels a bit bad for interrupting Louis.

“Oh-right. Yeah. I totally forgot. So how about five for Monday and then four for the rest of the week?” Louis suggested.

“Yeah. That’ll be alright,” Harry replied.

“Awesome.” Louis began to write.

After Louis pinned the schedule to his wall.

“Do you want me to make another one so you can remember?” Louis asked.

“Sure. Thanks,” Harry said. The real reason he wanted it was so he could analyze Louis handwriting.

“Sure thing.”

By the time Louis was done writing, Louis’ mom came up and told them dinner would be done in a half hour. She, of course, asked if Harry wanted to stay, and he honestly didn’t but he didn’t want to make any of them upset so he agreed to stay. There he was again; caring about other people. 

They sat down on the bed and Harry almost forgot about finding Louis’ pride flag until Louis brought it up again.

“I’m really sorry about earlier. If, like, you don’t want to talk to me anymore, I get it. But just know that like, I won’t hit on you or try anything on you, if that’s what you’re thinking. ‘M sorry.”

Harry smiled a little bit, his dimple popping out again. “No worries. I completely forgot about it.” 

“Sweet,” Louis smiled back at Harry.

Silence fell over them again. Harry went on his phone to text Zayn that he might be a little late tonight, he had to stay for dinner. He felt rude but he couldn’t help himself.

“Oh!” Louis yelled out and Harry jumped about five feet in the air.

“Jesus, man!” Harry called out, his heart still beating a thousand times faster than normal.

“Sorry,” Louis grinned, “But that was funny. You should have seen your face! Ha! Anyway, we didn’t talk about where we were going to study!”  
“Oh, yeah,” Harry shrugged. He couldn’t have Louis at his house. Not yet.

“We could just do it here since you seem pretty fond of my mother,” Louis joked, playfully nudging Harry.

“Haha, I’d like that. Sounds good. I do have a question, though. It’s been bugging me since I got here,” Harry turned to face Louis.

“Well, go on,” Louis encouraged.

“Do you drive? Like, is that your car here?” Harry asked.

“Yes,” Louis answered. 

“Okay. Sorry, that was weird, I just didn’t know if it was your dad’s or something,” Harry shrugged.

“Don’t worry about it. And no, my dad isn’t in the picture. It’s my car.”

Just then, Johannah popped through the door. “Time for dinner!"


	6. V

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Here's the new chapter finally. I deleted the update chapter, so if you're confused, that's why! Hope you haven't forgotten about me! :) Enjoy!
> 
> ALSO, this chapter is so short because I separated it into two chapters so I could double update! Hopefully this didn't turn you guys off :)

Dinner consisted of Louis and his mother joking around, Harry aimlessly poking around at his food, and Louis’ little sisters flinging food at each other. 

When it looked like Harry ate most of his dinner, he stood up, going to wash his plate off but Johannah stopped him. 

“Oh, Harry, dear, don’t you worry about that. I’ll get it!” She rushed over to Harry and took the plate from him, placing it on the counter. 

“Thank you,” Harry blushed, he wasn’t used to having things done for him. 

“No problem, dear, you are a guest in this house. I can’t possibly put you to work in good conscious,” She smiled and patted him on the back.

By the time Harry was done smiling a dimpled smile, Louis was at his mother’s side, helping her with the dishes. Harry just stood there, admiring how helpful and how caring Louis was to his mother and to the people around him, especially Harry. Harry treated Louis terribly, even though they had just met the day prior. He yelled at him and belittled him, and it made Harry angry with himself. He was so frustrated he wanted to cry. But he didn’t. He remained calm, picking at his nails until Louis popped up next to him. 

“Hey, Harry. I’m sorry, I just wanted to help my mom because she already has a tough time, I didn’t want to make it even harder for her,” He smiled, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Oh,” Harry’s voice cracked, so he cleared his throat and tried again, “Oh, that’s alright. No worries.”

Harry checked his phone. 7:37 pm. Zayn wanted to come ‘round at eight. That gave Harry 23 minutes to get home. It took him ten to drive to Louis’ house, which gives him thirteen minutes before Harry needs to leave, give or take a few minutes, Harry quickly crunches the numbers in his head. 

“Earth to Harry,” Louis waved a hand in front of Harry’s face. 

“Huh? Oh, sorry, what’d you say?” Harry blinked a couple times.

“I said, what time do you need to be home?” Louis smiled a little bit.

“I’m sorry, I zoned out. Uh, I gotta be home by eight. It takes me ten minutes to drive, though. So I still have ten minutes before I need to leave.”

Louis smiled again. “Cool, do you wanna go back up to my room to get the schedule before you leave?”

“Yeah! That’d be great, otherwise, I’d forget, honestly,” Harry smiled and Louis’ eyes lit up as he laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Technically, this chapter isn't finished. But I felt like I could break it off and set it into two chapters. Chapter 5.2 is called chapter six :)


	7. VI

Harry followed Louis back up to his room for the second time that night. Grabbing the paper that had Louis’ tiny scribbles on it and his jacket, he followed Louis to the front door. The girls and Johannah were upstairs, it was just the two boys alone. Harry had one hand on the door handle and the other clenching the white slip. 

Louis was standing a few feet behind Harry, waiting to lock the door.

“Hey, Louis?” Harry stopped and turned around when he was halfway out the door.

“Yeah?” Louis looked up at Harry. 

“I―,” He paused, “Never mind, sorry. Have a good night,” Harry waved and ran to his car, unlocking it and getting in quickly. He drove home without looking back, his hands gripping the steering wheel so tight, his knuckles were as white as the paper that Louis gave him. 

\-------

Harry got home and threw himself against his wheel. He let out a loud scream before regaining his composure and stepping out of his car and into his apartment. Zayn would be pulling in any second now. Harry quickly went into the kitchen and got some alcohol out of the cabinet. Just as he was putting the tequila down on the coffee table, there was a knock on his door. He knew it was Zayn, but he was hoping it was actually Louis. He sighed and opened the door. Zayn came striding in.

“Holy shit, dude. You look rough. What happened?” Zayn headed straight for the alcohol.

“A lot. Let me order some pizza and I’ll tell you what happened,” Harry rubbed his eyes, taking a glass of liquor and downing it. 

\----

Harry sat, with a slice of pizza in his hand, finishing his story, “And I wanted to kiss him. I wanted to tell him I was gay and I wanted to lean in and smash our lips together. I wanted that so bad and I just met him. God, Zayn, what’s happening to me?” 

Zayn just laughed and patted Harry’s knee. “I don’t know man, but I’m glad you’re not as freaked out as when you-”

“Don’t ruin the mood, but yeah. I know. Crazy shit. I don’t know what to do,”Harry held his head in his hands again. 

“Dude, you need to relax. Wanna put on a movie or something? Have a dance party? We need to get you in a good mood,” Zayn laughed and nudged Harry’s shoulder.

Harry lifted his head and chuckled. He was so grateful for Zayn. “Put on the tunes!”

Harry and Zayn jumped around, and at that moment, everything felt like it was going in slow motion. For the first time in a very long time, Harry felt truly calm.


	8. VI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sort of just a filler?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while but I'm back now!

Zayn stayed over for another few hours. Both of the teenagers were completely shitfaced, and Harry never wanted it to end. It was the best day he’s had in a long while.

While Zayn was stumbling towards the door, Harry called him a taxi. He didn’t want Zayn driving while he was as drunk as he was. Harry turned Zayn around and hugged him. He hugged him for five minutes and when he finally let go, Zayn’s glazed-over eyes were teary.

“I love you, man. Thank you for always being there for me. I’m glad I have a best friend like you. Just, Thanks. For everything,” Zayn slurred.

Harry was at a loss for words. He had a hard time saying the L word ever since...Harry shook his head to get rid of his horrid thoughts and smiled at Zayn. He patted him on the back and Zayn understood. He nodded once and left Harry’s apartment. Harry followed him out to make sure he didn’t fall down the stairs. Harry cared about his best friend, even though he could never say it out loud.

“See you later, H. I will text you when I am home safe, if I don’t pass out first,” Zayn called back to Harry before leaving the apartment complex and getting into the taxi. 

Harry went back inside and shut his TV off. He looked at all the empty liquor bottles and decided to clean them up tomorrow. He wished it wasn’t the weekend, he really wanted to see Louis. He enjoyed the positive energy his house radiates. He misses having a family. Of course, he would never get one back. Harry started to let his mind get the best of him, but Harry didn’t feel emotion anymore, so he didn’t cry. He just laid in bed, feeling empty. That is until his phone lit up. He rolled over to check it, thinking it was Zayn telling him he was safe.

Harry squinted at his phone, his eyes adjusting to the brightness. He saw Louis’ name pop up.

‘Had a good time with you today, Harry. Thanks. Have a good night. See you Monday at five.’

Harry smiled and typed a quick reply. He set his phone down again and fell asleep, Louis on his mind.

\------

Harry woke up the next morning feeling refreshed, and only slightly hungover, surprisingly. He checked his phone and saw that Zayn texted him, however, none of the words were spelled correctly. He also saw that Louis replied to him, and Harry desperately wanted to continue the conversation, but he didn’t want to, afraid of getting attached too quickly, or at all for that matter. He couldn’t afford to lose somebody else. He was guarded and didn’t want that to change any time soon, even though Louis was getting through the walls he had put up. He hated it. He hated wanting to talk to somebody again. He just wanted to feel lonely again. It’s what he deserved.

Yet again, Harry’s wandering thoughts put him in a bad mood. He just wanted to be happy, but he felt like that was so far out of reach. Harry felt like happiness was impossible. 

He got up from his bed and went to get a glass of wine for his breakfast. He didn’t want to drink too much, he got invited to a party that night and was going to get drunk there. He asked the host if he could bring Zayn along, it was never fun to get drunk without him. She, of course, said yes, the more the merrier. Harry wondered if Louis got invited, but deemed it unlikely because he was an underclassman and Harry wasn’t sure if parties were his scene.

Harry decided to watch a few movies before jumping in the shower and getting ready to go to the party.


End file.
